Tell It Like You Still Believe The End Of The Century Brings A Change For You And Me

Wow. So much has been going on in my life since my last update.

Thanksgiving break is almost over, and as usual, I've completely put off doing everything I told myself I would do. I hate myself.

Marching band is over, and it makes me want to cry. Marching band is my life. Now I have to settle with concert band. But it's not too bad, because I'm in Sym. 1. If I were still in Concert 1, my life would suck so incredibly much more. Plus, next semester, I'm going to be in a sax quartet! I'm so excited! PLLUUSSS, B-Rob is going to try to work out my schedule to get me into Jazz Band, but I highly doubt he can pull that one off. I have to take World History and Algebra 2 and probably give up Spanish to retake Physics.

I don't think you quite fully grasp the concept of how much I hate myself.

More and more everyday, I need someone to hind behind....Someone to take care of me....I was watching Cowboy Bebop last night and the episode was called Ganymede Elegy. It was mostly about Jet. Jet went back to Ganymede and found his former lover, Elisa. Elisa left Jet randomly one day, and finally she explained to him why....holding Jet at gunpoint. But her hands were unsteady and she never managed to shoot him. She left him because she didn't like to be taken care of. I wanted to slap her. That's all I want...someone to take care of me.

I need someone to hide behind.

Hm, I'm hoping that I'll begin to enjoy Winterguard more, because as of now, I'm not too terribly fond of it, because I can't dance for beans. But I'm not that bad at spinning a flag.

Lately, I've been stressing myself over whether I should ask Jamie out. I decided against. In fact, I was thinking about it earlier, and I believe that I'm starting to stop liking him. Which is definitely a good thing. So, as of now, I don't like anyone, which is a feeling I'm not used to, but I need it.

Ryan helped me interpret one of my dreams. Just in case, I've asked Dr. Lynch to interpret it, too. I wonder if Ryan was right...

Well, anyways.

I miss marching band.

Mom and I went out and bought some nice dress up clothes for me. I'm looking forward to an ocassion to wearing them. I'm also really really looking forward to Band Banquet. But it's not until forever. And ever.

Only 170-something more days until Rookie Camp!